The Commandments

for dealing with Narcissists

  1. You can only be in a relationship with a narcissist if you will always accept what they want and accept you won't have agency

    You can't be with a narcissist and maintain your own sense of self. You need to accept this first and move on, using the rest of the commandments to break free from their hold on you.

  2. Don’t engage

    In conversation or argument, you will never change their minds or convince them of your position. So just don’t even try. It’s a waste of energy.

  3. Never say no (but never say yes)

    Narcissists hate being told no. But due to point 1, you won’t convince them otherwise. So don’t bother. Distract, kick the can down the road, sound positive, don’t say yes but never say no.

  4. Stop worrying about what they think

    Following on from 1 - when you stop caring what they think, you stop engaging, you humour them and you become free.